Luana and Patrick Johnson share their story of Loss and Hope

Luana and her husband Patrick Johnson met around 10 years ago. Their relationship is special because there is a mix of cultures you don’t usually see. Luana is half Korean and half Italian but was born and raised in Brazil until age 11. Her husband Patrick is half Swedish and part Cherokee Indian and was raised in Georgia. They were married in 2018 and found out they were pregnant in 2020.

This story is a great example of how miscarriage doesn’t discriminate. No one background has more or less than another and Luana and Patrick have such a diverse backgrounds that there is little chance that it was what caused the miscarriages.

3 Generations. Luana’s Korean mom, Luana, Aliya, and Hope @Reflections by Luna

The pregnancy started normally, and they were super excited to become parents. They had their first ultrasound at 9 weeks with blood work, confirming the pregnancy and that everything was going well. But a few weeks later, things took a turn and Luana started bleeding heavily. They ended up in the ER where their worst nightmare was confirmed. They had lost the baby.

Luana says “We had two other pregnancies that were not successful after our first and when we least expected it, we found out we were pregnant again. This time it felt different and it sure was. We learned we were having twins.” A double rainbow after 3 losses.

Aliya and Hope with their mom Luana Johnson @5 months old @reflections by luna

Although it was her rainbow pregnancy, there was a lot of anxiety revolving around the pregnancy itself. She was deemed high risk after 3 miscarriages and having twins and was monitored carefully. There was a cyst in her uterus and the specialist told them that the babies might not make it past 20 weeks, so they kept the pregnancy to themselves for a while. She also had hyperemesis and was constantly sick and throwing up which didn’t help. She was hospitalized because of the massive weight loss from the hyperemesis. They thought they were going to lose the twins at that point.

According to the article Hyperemesis Gravidarum on, “Hyperemesis gravidarum is a condition characterized by severe nausea, vomiting, weight loss, and electrolyte disturbances. Mild cases are treated with dietary changes, rest, and antacids. More severe cases often require a stay in the hospital so that the mother can receive fluid and nutrition.”

One of the hardest experiences that she went through during her twin pregnancy is when her boss chooses to announce on Facebook that she was pregnant before she had a chance to tell her friends and family. They were waiting to announce until after the age of viability (22-23 weeks) due to the cyst in the uterus and the previous losses.

“My boss, who knew that was keeping it a secret until we felt it was safe, took it upon herself to share about the existence of the twins to coworkers and all my family and friends on Facebook. This happened during my second day in the hospital, and I could not control how devastated and hurt I was…I remember how hard it was to tell people my baby didn’t make it the first time and now in case these two didn’t make it, I would have to do the same thing again. It broke my spirit.” Said Luana regarding the high anxiety and sadness that this incident caused her during an already stressful situation.

Patrick has shared a big part in their story. It was just as hard on him as it was on Luana when they lost their first pregnancy, but he said, “Knowing how hard this was for my wife, I knew I had to provide steadiness,” So many times, it is always about the mom. But the dad and even siblings can suffer too. It is just as hard on them even though they try to be strong. When Luana got pregnant with the twins Patrick was very excited but also nervous.  

“I was so excited,” he said. “I had a feeling she might have been pregnant. So when she told me she was, I was very excited and shocked that I could tell before a pregnancy test could.”

But there were also hard parts of the pregnancy for both. Patrick said the hardest part for him was “All the unknowns. See my wife get so sick and feeling like I couldn’t do much about it.”

Her twins are identical, but they have some features from each parent that help distinguish them. Luana said, “They look so different to me. I think Hope looks like my husband and Aliya looks like me.”

Aliya and Hope Johnson holding hands at 5 months old @reflections by luna

Because Luana only had 3 miscarriages and never had any testing done to see what caused the miscarriages, they will be classified as unknown causes. As most miscarriages are. But that doesn’t make the loss any easier. The feeling of aloneness, anxiety, and sometimes even depression that come with a loss or loss can hurt a person. Many resources are available for those going through a loss or who have gone through one in the past.

Please check out my podcast @Rainbow Babies Unite Podcast season 1 episode 1 for information about a life coach who works with angel mums and is an angel mum herself on healing emotionally, mentally, and physically after a loss. You can also join my support group at RAINBOW BABIES UNITE on Facebook.

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